‘… struggling with the burdens of your existence.’

 One of the great ‘joys’ (by which I mean it is sometimes a great curse too) of being an Aspie is that everything tends to get over-analysed – I am not just talking about reading a few articles, or browsing online for an hour or two…. no, no….. I am talking about complete absorption in the subject(s) for days/weeks/months on end until a very good working knowledge is gained (where giving a one hour lecture on the subject would be no hardship at all) – at the expense of almost any other social interaction if the task/problem demands it! The cause and effect of situations gets torn down to the nth-degree and a microscopic inspection of all possibilities is undertaken to try and discern the ‘whys and wherefores’ of life on general, but the incident specifically under scrutiny is given prime focus at all times. The reasoning behind this one-track approach to analysing a situation is because Aspies (well, certainly me, for sure) often struggle to ‘see’ the underlying social reasoning, the emotionally driven nature and the intuitive reactions of how people behave towards each other. Facts, cause, effect, structure and worth all need to be very carefully looked at, catalogued and ready for bringing out again in the future when a slightly different situation happens – to see if past experience can shed light on the latest one.

This is often truly wearing emotionally, timewise and physically as well as being a considerable burden on those folk around us who can witness our inner struggle and determination to ‘find out’ all the details for ourselves, no matter the cost… If I am not careful, and I know other Aspies have been through this too, the whole process can take a very negative toll on my wellbeing and it is for this reason that I came up with the following affirmation – one that I have to keep reminding myself about, still!

On the positive side, and there is always a positive side, the analytical nature of my brain, and the focussed attention to detail meant that I very naturally slotted into an IT career in the early 1980s with computers always close at hand ever since, and being a IT trouble-shooter for many customers, over very many years, has been second-nature to me. Dedication to the minutest details is crucial when dealing with computers, and has meant my skills have been the means of a very worthwhile income, without requiring much person-to-person contact at all. I work surrounded by my computers now, by myself, and happily engaged in work for long-term customers with whom I have developed an excellent professional relationship. So, every cloud has a silver lining, and some clouds even pay the bills! 🙂

Another small insight into the Aspie way of life – enjoy, and peace to you all 🙂

yourself1(Macro photography (stamen is only 2mm across), and taken by me)

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‘Be kind to yourself when the world is causing you pain, and take care of your body’s needs when you are struggling with the burdens of your existence. Your life is a beautiful thing and, like a tender plant or a large tree, needs shelter, nourishment, light and space to grow and be useful.’

~ Gaius Quinterus

7 thoughts on “‘… struggling with the burdens of your existence.’

    • Thank you – learning, just for the sake of it, can of course become an addiction, so I always have to aware of that taking over if I am not careful. However, with age, I have progressively learned to better focus on what is most worthwhile to learn about in a given situation – partly because I have analysed so many in the past that I have simple experience to build on now. But, having said that, people still surprise/shock/astonish me on a regular basis!

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  1. I love this meme and the thoughts behind it. Sometimes I struggle to be kind to myself with the continuing frustrations of disability vs work.
    Thankyou. 🙂

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    • My pleasure, Rebecca – getting the balance right is always difficult, but taking care of ourselves has to figure in among everything else, otherwise it is hard to function at all. Take care 🙂

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  2. Thank you! Actually I found your writing to be very enlightening in understanding my son. He, also, examines and explores to the very detail for blocks at a time until it is to his satisfaction that he has learned or set out what he is intending to do. I see it as a dedicated artist to their work…the flames of their vision and thirsting needs to know…can take over…until the masterpiece is created. I hope as a parent that I can help my son learn how to take care of his body and negotiate time as he passionately lives. That depth of living can be so rewarding and enriching. As with anything, there are struggles and rewards. Your words are so inspirational. I need to learn how to quench and nurture myself as well. Beautiful photo and saying!

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